open'ess

I find it rather hard to place them into words, but i am trying as much as i can to pen them down so that i can also get a clearer picture of what He is trying to tell me and a clearer picture on what is on my mind.
i was shocked at my inabilities to receive new ideas and how i have framed how my life should be like. how ministry should be, how things should work out. hehe :) don't get me wrong, i have long sorted out the reason why i am doing what i am doing and all things are not merely about the accomplishing of tasks assigned, nor is my life living just the way others have been educating me to it. i just felt that it was something interesting i realise of myself, sometimes i feel like such a conservative and uptight person to a certain extent ...
however, i stopped today as i ask God what my role is in various aspects of my life. As a shepherd over His flock, as a full timer, as a girl friend, in future as a church planter? ... i paused as i realise the Holy Spirit prompting my heart that i am not here to fulfil a role, but i am here to be who He wants me to be. the fulfilling the calling He has upon my life is not about filling up a pair of shoes, but about being moulded into a pair of shoes. I am not fitting into a mould that anyone could have drafted, but i am being crafted into the one God, the potter is moulding me into!
Open'ess. I want to be open to listen to my creator who i really am. I want to be open to listen to Him tell me who my sheep truely is, who Kel really is, who people around me truely is.
Its such an exciting journey to discover who we are created to be. Who we truely are in this world of norms, expectations, customs and traditions. Who are we actually? hidden behind our personalities, roles and responsibilities. Only the maker of the heaven and earth, the potter of every creation could reveal to us. It's so intrigueing to find out that out of God's holy 10 Commandments, and behind His intention of us growing towards Christ Likeness, He did not create us like robots who will fit into His "system"; He made us individual, unique beings who bears a portion of His likeness, shone forth in our unique flavour and through our unique path.
How awesome is that?