The Night of Encounter

I thought about what burdens me most. It's not the pursue of dreams and career. It's not reputation nor is it status. It's not prestige. It's the grieve of losing my love ones, that all i hold will be memories of them deeply carved in my heart. Fear of them suddenly leaving and yet to experience the love of God. Panic occasionally strikes me, the "what ifs" ... 'what if i get a sudden call of bad news from home' ... 'what ifs .... '

HE asked me once again, what matters most? I found myself with tears streaming down, replying that i want to stand and testify. I want to proclaim that His faithfulness and sovereignty stands forever. I want to be used as a mouthpiece, a disciple-maker, a living vessel. I want to stay committed in times of trials and challenges and grip on His calling, like the persistent lil puppy who just would not let your sleeve go.

He gave me strength and hope, He gave me the peace that nothing else could replace. He holds my future, He holds OUR future. I saw a picture of a castle like building. Bricks were laid, layer by layer, precepts by precepts. He is building His kingdom inside my heart, and that's eternal! I realised i need not figure out the details of God's life plan for me and for the loved ones around me. All i need to figure out is to walk the walk, trusting that He holds it all!